Having own kids?

Recently I think I am in love with beef balls and dinner alone in Ikea. Today after movie with a friend, he had to leave early and I have to dinner alone. As usual I went to Ikea and get my all time favorite Beef Balls and Chicken Wings. After take my food I sit alone in a place in the middle of the area where I can observe everyone around me. I do not know since when I enjoy to eat dinner alone. Last time, I will never have meal outside alone. Either I will take away or just cook at home. I felt like eating alone outside is very pity and lonely. But now, I start liking it and enjoy myself. Now I felt so glad and happy that I can eat nice food and stay healthy. I feel so thankful to The Almighty one.
During dinner, of course I cannot let my eyes. I keep on watching around and observe what happen around us. I found it’s interesting to do so. I notice that Ikea provide a very nice place for family to enjoy their meals here. There have special area for kids to have meal and some toys for them to play. Many parents sit there just to accompany their kids and feed them. Suddenly I feel like nowadays kids are getting more n better treated. Parents bring them out for shopping and enjoy nice food. They just run around and play during meal time. Either mom or dad will follow around them like bodyguard and feed them. This scenario really makes me think a lot of things. I would like to share some here.

I still remember when I was a young boy, I went holiday trip with my mom and some aunties in a beach. I saw a few Caucasian boys and girls; I was mesmerized by the colors of their eyes. Ocean blue…light green…and grey eyes. Straight away I told my mom: Mi, I want to marry a “gui mui” (white girl) when I grow up then I want to have cute children with ocean blue eyes. They are so cute la. Thinking of this make me laugh at the naïve and innocent me. But now, I still remember what I told my mom before: Mi, I do not want kids in my life. I want freedom and I do not want to bind by commitment. Have your own kid means you’re responsible as a parents to take care of your kid and make sure the kid can grow in a healthy environment. I understand my words will hurt her, but yet this is what I want for my life and I know it clearly. Somehow I went through some unhappy childhood that keeps hunting me till end of my life. The impact to me is hard to remove or cure. Not to be mention here. I would not like my next generation will go through this anymore. I know I cannot give the best to my next generation and the most important is I need freedom for my life.
A lot of times my close buddies and I discuss on should we have kids for ourselves? Or should we adopt one? Of course every one of us has different opinions and all opinions support by strong reasons. Some say that I need no to have kid due to satisfied family or parents’ need. A lot of family or parents have this strong concept that we all must produce our next generation in order to carry our names or whatever is it. But I think is every own individual choice to have a kid or not. No one have the rights to judge you are right or wrong. As many old people said, parents are the one who give you life but the rest of your pathway should be walk by yourself. Destiny is on our own hand, why should we being judge or influence to do something that we do not like or even think of? I clearly know that I am not a tool of parents to mass produce or keep the generation goes on. I know clearly what I want and what I want for my life. If I want a kid, I will surely give my 100% to my kid. But this is not what I want. If to say that we need to contribute to the society or this world, there are many things else we can do besides having our own kid. Such as support save the world activities, sponsor children in poor places who are suffering, recycle and so on. For me, sponsor children in poor countries are very meaningful. Yet I know now my ability is restricted due to financial problem and I am still a student. But when I have stable financial I would like to sponsor children who are really in need. The money your donate might be a small amount but it can help a lot of children to survive or to get education. Giving chances to such children are even more meaningful to me. There are too many people out there who need our help. So, is this considered a contribution to our world and society?
Some of my friends who suggest that adoption would be the way they want. Of course they have their supporting ideas and reasons. But I believe children who grow up in a so called “unhealthy” family or background is difficult to survive or to face society when they grow up. In a family where consist or either mom or dad only, can they be brought up healthy? How would others kids see them when they only have either one parent? Can they take all the words where others say to them? This world is changing and everything is getting different where majority might become minorities or the other way round. No one know what will happen? Don’t you agree? Everyone also keep on changing everyday. Life is unpredictable. Well, life is short. I must live it to the fullest and do what I want for my future. This most important is what I want and enjoy my life.
Back to my dinner. Keep on thinking, having meal alone is nothing bad or to be shy of after all. It’s the time where you spend time on yourself to enjoy food and think of something where you do not think normally? So, is this the normal me? Or abnormal? But I truly believe that we are normal because we are abnormal.

Oriental style beef carbonara

Tomorrow im going to have my practical exam, kinda worry but i am totally ready for it:) today in a nice mood for cooking....i tried out something more local and yet i still have much spaghetti in my house....hehehe.....

Step 1: Boil hot water and cook spaghetti
Step 2: Cut carrot and french beans into thin slices, chop some garlic and ready for use
Step 3: Pan fry some thin slices of beef quickly to avoid over cook, season with salt and black pepper
Step 4: Remove the beef on a plate, slice it into smaller pieces.
Step 5: With the remain juice on the pan where left over by the beef, saute with some garlic and add in some olive oil. add some mix herbs of own choice.
Step 6: Add in whipping cream, use small fire slowly let the sauce simmer. Season with salt. When is cook, add in an egg and stir it quickly.
Step 7: Add in the cooked spaghetti, stir it and serve on a plate.
Step 8:Saute some garlic, put sliced carrot and french bean and saute. season with salt.
Step 9: Serve all the cooked ingrediants on a plate and ready to MAKAN!

Worst noodle i ever try!

Visit back to a familiar food court after 1year moved from subang. i bought my self a nasi lemak....omg...taste terrible, the chicken is so not fresh and the cucumber is abit yellowish...omg...my friend ordered a bowl of duck "kuer teow"...omg....tatse even more worst...you can feel like eating WAX into your stomach, and the duck meat like dunno cook how many times....eeww...terrible...we just leave it there and we will never back there again...sucks

local taste penne

it's a lovely sat morning. woke up and in the mood for cooking....hehehe....i try out some new recipe...actually there doesn't left much ingredients so i give a shot.

Preparation: first smash to hard boiled eggs and add in some mayonnaise. boil water, add some salt to cook some penne. while waiting it to cook, cut Japanese cucumber and baby butterhead into stripes. slice some garlic. strain the penne when is cook and ready for use.

Cook: heat up the pan with some butter, saute garlic and some crushed black pepper. let the butter burn a bit to give the brownish color to the penne. put in the cooked penne and toast the pan. add in some "maggie curry powder" for seasoning.

place the cut cucumber and baby butterhead on plate, put the cooked penne on top. garnish with the smashed eggs and some chicken floss....ready to be serve....yumm yumm...